Thursday, September 08, 2011
Like Nails on a Chalkboard
Some people get a cringing feeling when they hear nails grating against a chalkboard. For me, the thought of biting into yarn or of nails digging into wool makes me shudder.
Aside from these, there are other things more fashion-related that result in a similar adverse reaction. Call them pet peeves if you will. When I see these horrors on anyone, I wonder why?—WHY?! I generally feel they're completely avoidable, and therefore should not happen. If you have a mirror, there's no excuse. Here are the ones that top my list:
1. Visible Panty Lines aka VPL. Since the invention of the thong, there has been no excuse for VPL. None, whatsoever. If the fabric of your pants isn't thick enough to conceal your panty lines, then your shirt is either too short, or you need to wear a thong. Simple enough. If you're sitting there going 'well guess what, thongs aren't comfortable' then you're probably not wearing the right kind. Invest in some Hanky Panky ones, they're worth every penny. Or wear a longer shirt.
2. Leggings as pants. Sorry ladies, but leggings aren't pants. Unless they're made of material similar to riding jodhpurs, then they're meant to be layered over with a tunic or dress that covers your butt. Here's a simple test: If you hold your leggings up to a light and you can see the light through them, they're not pants. Don't even get me started on the people who wear leggings as pants and then have VPL...
3. Sheer jersey. There's a time and place for sheer clothing. I'm actually quite fond of it, when done right. But when something is sheer and it's not supposed to be, then the wearer doesn't realize it's sheer—well, that's where we have a problem. The culprit is usually jersey, the cheap kind, that looks opaque on a hanger, but when you try it on reveals more of your undergarments than anyone needs to see. Did I mention this material also highlights lumps and bumps like no other? To check for sheerness, follow the same light-test technique as #2.
4. Camel toe. I get it, camel toe happens. But it doesn't have to. The reason for camel toe is ill-fitting clothing and bad material. Most commonly, it happens with workout gear like loose jersey yoga pants—or leggings without enough spandex in them. Here's a tip, make sure your pants have enough heft to them. Also, check a mirror regularly. If, after wearing your pants for a while, you notice it happening, do yourself a favor and throw them out.
5. Not dressing for your body. Now, this has nothing to do with size. No matter what your weight, everyone has a different shape. But it's important to know what it is in order to pick flattering clothing. I'm all for empowered dressing and owning your figure, but just because you can fit into something doesn't mean you should. At the end of the day, just because something fits girl A doesn't mean it'll work on girl B or C.
Photo source: DCD